How do I overcome my fears?
Many of my clients come to me because they are afraid of life in general especially the future and what it holds for them. There is a lot of uncertainty in the world to-day and this causes people to be stressed, anxious and overwhelmed.
Some interesting stuff about fears.
Fear about speaking in public is up there depending on what stats you look at, it is in the top 3 of fears. Unconsciously one of the reasons people have fears about speaking in public comes from school days when we were forced to speak in front of the class and sometimes we were made fun of. Sometimes we have fears and have no idea where they came from. I used to be very scared of dying in a fire. Nobody in my family circle or friends had ever been in a fire and nobody I knew had died in a fire, therefore it was baffling to me why I was afraid of this. Once I did my training and had to face my fears I overcame the fear of dying in a fire. Thankfully I no longer obsess over that anymore.
So…..what is it that you are afraid of and how can you overcome your fears?
What can you do to overcome your fears?
- Speak about them
- Rationalize them
- Get professional help
- Refuse to let them have power over you
Now you are thinking, all very easy for you to say, just wait till I see that next spider, right?
Here is a simple exercise you can do that may help you.
Think of the thing you are most afraid of – take that image and push it as far away from you as you can and let it get smaller and smaller. Push it all the way to the horizon where it is a tiny spec and let it fall off the edge. Take a deep breath and then think of the thing you are most afraid of again, is there a difference in how you feel about it now? Repeat the exercise until you feel different about the fear.
This is just one way you can help get rid of your fears and overcome them. Another powerful tool is Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) which I use every day and teach all of my clients this tool. Especially kids.
Do you remember when you were a kid and you were afraid of the dark?
Being afraid of the dark is real for you as a child, do you remember your parents turning the light on and saying there is nothing to be afraid of, turning the light off, shutting the door and leaving you to your fear? When your child comes to you and says they are afraid of the dark, remember it is real for them. Empathize with them and validate their emotion, then you can ask them what specifically is it that they are afraid of and talk about that. Also, there is nothing wrong with having a nite lite in their room no matter how old they are. As an adult, I had a nite lite when I lived by myself 🙂
Whatever your fear is there is a way to overcome it if you want to. So if you are afraid of snakes you might not think it is worth it because realistically how often to you come across snakes?
The problem is the voice in our heads. Yes, it is ok that you have a voice in your head and it constantly is reminding you that you are afraid of that thing you hate and fear the most. There are techniques to dealing with your self-talk. One of course, is to ignore it, not always easy to do. Try the following and see if it works for you.
- Turn down the volume
- Make the voice into a high-pitched squeaky voice
- Turn the voice into someone’s voice that makes you laugh
- Acknowledge what the voice is saying, thank it and then dismiss it.
Surround yourself with positive images, positive music and repeat positive mantras to yourself all the time. All of these can help in some way to overcome those fears. However when you have a phobia then I would suggest seeking out a professional to help you.
Fears are real and can stop us from living a full and healthy life. Overcoming those fears is up to you. You alone have to make the decision to overcome what it is you are afraid of and live an empowered and fear free life.
Please now share this post for others to benefit. Comment and let me know how you overcame your fear or how you intend to overcome your fear.
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