Women in their 50’s, going through menopause are amazing, self-assured, knowledgeable, got it all together, you would think!!! Female Menopause means different things to different women.
All of them had very similar challenges.
What I found was some of them were confident, self-assured, knowledgeable, took care of themselves and were independent women. These are the ones who wanted to better themselves, rid themselves of baggage and re-awaken themselves, ready, willing and able for living the 2nd half of their lives.
These were also the women where they realized that part of their baggage was their husbands of 20+ years. Now the kids had gone and they were back to just the two of them they realized there was something missing.
The other women were the ones who thought their lives were over. Approaching or going through menopause, they felt they were losing their womanhood, losing their sex appeal, losing their looks. Losing control of themselves as women.
Some of them were having panic attacks, anxiety issues, major stress, and depression, some were even suicidal.
Then second set of women, who although I was coaching/counseling and empathizing with them – I too was going through menopause and I thought it was the best thing that could ever happen to me.
No periods, the family had grown up and left home, baggage has gone including the husband. Free to do whatever I want when I wanted. Growing everyday, spiritually, socially, getting to know the real me and enjoying every second of it.
So what is it that makes us women go through the late ’40s and 50’s so differently?
Is it to do with Self Esteem??
I really don’t think so, because some of my clients were extremely confident, successful women who were in the half who thought their life was over. Self Esteem comes and goes in different situations.
Self Esteem comes and goes in different situations and different women.
In some cultures, women in their 50’s who have gone through menopause are revered as elders in their communities. The younger generation look up to them for advice regarding their experience of a women’s knowledge of life.
The Media and Society Brain Wash.
How some women react to their 50’s has a lot to do with media and society along with pharmaceutical companies. These companies advertise that all women will get the following symptoms
- Hot Flashes,
- Weight gain
- Vaginal dryness,
- Low libido,
- Facial hair,
- Sagging arms
and so much more. How are the women meant to react when they are bombarded all the time with this in their face all the time?
Unfortunately, most women are buying into it and therefore become exactly what the hype says they will become. They also follow the drug companies’ advice and take all sorts of medications.
One of my clients who is a size 1 and in her 50’s went through the menopause with absolutely no symptoms whatsoever and did not gain an ounce in weight. Obviously, this does not apply to everyone, this is just one of the clients in my research.
She has no facial hair and is loving her freedom and one of her sayings is “Because I Can”At this stage of her life, she can do whatever she wants, whenever she wants without any restrictions. She also believes, as I do, you become what you think about.
I cannot even say you are what you eat as my client eats exactly what she wants every day which includes chocolate and french fries and never gains weight, not the same for all of us I realize.
Another thing I noticed with these women that I researched is they were leaving their husbands. Really emancipating themselves and not settling as they had been before.
The other side of the coin was that the husbands were leaving the wives, some of these were the trigger from the women to feel their lives were over and they were no longer sexy, attractive, confident females. They were past their sell-by date.
What are some of the things you can do to overcome negative menopause?
If you are reading this post then I am sure you want to find out how I was able to help myself and my clients. Remember every woman is different and what works for one does not work for the other. You have to test different things and do what works for you.
Attitude: Staying positive and recognizing your change in mood, irritability, loss of interest or anything that is not what you are normally like. When you are mindful of yourself and your moods then you can be aware of what changes are happening to you.
Diet: Has your body shape changed, has your weight changed, if so what are you eating that is not supporting your health and wellness. Be aware of what foods and drinks are having an effect on your body, that did not have an effect before.
- Black Cohosh. (Actaea racemosa, Cimicifuga racemosa) This herb has received quite a bit of scientific attention for its possible effects on hot flashes. …
- Red Clover. …
- Dong Quai. …
- Ginseng. …
- Kava. …
- Evening Primrose Oil. …
- Sleep in removable layers of clothing.
- Wear breathable, natural fibers Avoid constrictive clothing Reduce consumption of warm beverages.
- Reduce alcohol and caffeine intake.
- Turn down the thermostat.
- Apply a cold, wet compress to cool down.
- Avoid spicy or very warm foods.
There are many symptoms you think you may be going through and you can easily research natural remedies for that particular symptom. However, my main object for this post is to do with how you react mentally and emotionally whilst going through the menopause.
- Positive Affirmations
- Keep Hydrated
Be honest with yourself about your life situation and whatever it is do not blame it on menopause. The situation of the empty nesting or realizing your partner is not the person you want to spend your golden years with are not symptoms of menopause, this is you becoming aware of your situation.
In Conclusion, the two sets of women who were my clients is just something I was curious about and not something that has statistical or even a broader view of how women behave going through menopause. I was however intrigued that there were clear distinctions in the mindset of these women which is my point. The mindset has a great deal to do with how we act, react and respond to what is going on in our lives whether it pertains to our health and well-being or situations going on around us.
Therefore no matter where you are in your life right now if you are not entirely happy with all aspects then look at what you have to change so that all your needs are being met. Look at your mindset, self talk and whether you are looking at things in a positive manner or a negative manner.