Are you really awake? Or is the world passing you by?

Are you really awake

Are you really awake?

How many times have you heard the words, ‘you have to change’ I know I have heard them several times over the years. Very frustrating!!

Yes, there are many things we can change about ourselves, our work, our life style the list goes on and on. We go really dissect every inch of ourselves and come up with a list as long as your arm.

A number of clients I have had that spend a great part of their life wishing they could change, wishing they could have changed the past and living a life of guilt, fear, and anger because they cannot go back and change anything.

Plenty of professions make millions of dollars every year ‘helping’ people deal with the changes they did not make in the past.

WAKE UP PEOPLE you cannot change the past……..all you can change is how you feel about your past and how you look at your past.  Learn from your past experiences.  Yes, experience NOT a mistake…..

I know……. there are several things in my past I wish I had done differently and I spent a lot of years full of guilt and regret, then one day I woke up and realized the only person that was even thinking about my past was me.  The only person hurting about my past was me.  My past was affecting my present.  Which when you think about it is all we have, and we ruin the present all the time by reacting emotionally from the past.

What I would suggest for you to do is enjoy the day one minute at a time, then 1 hour at a time and then move from there, there are people out there that can decide to make a change, wake up and move on and it happens to them immediately.  Others, however, have different levels of time before they can start to feel good.  Whatever you are – it is ok.

Also, it is ok to be happy, there is no guilt needed because you are feeling good, whatever you think happened in the past is which is making you think you must feel bad today.How awake are you

Life is way too short to keep reliving one part over and over I am sure that is not your life purpose.!!!

There is a multitude of quotes, advice, and things you can follow to help you through your past.  One thing I would always recommend is to watch what you eat and drink.

The best thing I would recommend is watching funny movies, being around positive people and learning to laugh a lot.  The chemical change in your brain when you laugh and feel good will help with your overall moods.

Make your choice today and ‘wake up’ to a wonderful present and future…....


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28 Comments

  1. Danay

    Reply

    This post is a great reminder to take control over your feelings and work to move forward. Thanks Helen!

    • helenvella

      Reply

      Totally your reaction to the past in the present is your choice and choosing positive thoughts and feelings is always the way to go.

  2. Blair villanueva

    Reply

    I’ve learned of letting go of the past and saying no at the early age, so these two are just easy peasy on me. And it helps me to shape for where I am today. And i’m happy.

  3. Kay

    Reply

    Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts on this. You are so right life is too short to keep living in the past and we must enjoy our lives one minute, hour at a time. We cannot have a future living in the past. If we focus on the past, we cease to live. Great post!

    • helenvella

      Reply

      You are right with your feedback, so many of us live in the past and act and react with the baggage that we live with. Mindful conscious if practised can help us all have less stress and anxiety.

  4. Reply

    Hello Helen
    Interesting and touching post. It is true, its not just few people but many of us live with the past guilt, its something or the other. I have past guilts too sometimes I feel I have overcome them and moved on and other times when things are not working well in my present life, i again go back to the past guilt and that makes it worse. But over the years I have learnt to control my emotions on it and not think a lot about those things that make me unhappy. Very true, past cannot be change so we got to change ourselves. Thank you for sharing.

    Best Regards
    Raman

    • helenvella

      Reply

      If we reflect on our past guilt and learn from them and move on then we can make sure we do not make the same decisions in the future. However, if the emotion attached to that memory is still very raw then it needs dealing with. I always recommend for the first instance Emotional Freedom Techniques. Worth looking into.

  5. Yvonne

    Reply

    You’re right. We can’t change the past. Nowadays I try not to reflect too much on the past (especially on unhappy memories) but look forward to the future. I avoid negativity and try not to take things too seriously. I think it helps to be a happier person.

    • helenvella

      Reply

      Totally agree and I am glad this is what you practice in your life. Less Stress and more laughing.

  6. Don

    Reply

    Hellenvella, great article. Your right about not being able to change the past. But we can use past experiences to understand why we do what we do in the present. Therefore, we are better equipped for dealing with our behaviors in the present and thereby, making changes. Some people enjoy being stuck where they are in life, being the victim, because it brings them attention. They love having “rescuers” coming to their aid and the rescuers enjoy coming to their aid – feeding on each others “needs” – codependency. Love your article.

    All the best to you,
    Don

    • helenvella

      Reply

      You are totally correct I find this in my clients also, it is called secondary gain. They stay in the negative state being a victim for the reasons you mention. Thanks for your insights.

  7. Reply

    Magic words…..”We have to Change”. I agree the most important thing we can change is our thinking. I believe we all have memories we regret and would love to forget; but they are there. To be totally free and really free we must remember each day is a “New Beginning” just like you explain….step by step. It is a work out and we have to train ourselves to strengthen ourselves to make that change of thought. Your suggestion of laughter and being around positive people are the way to go. Laughter alone I believe will greatly improve the proper balance of the quality of our lives. Thank you for being so clear about sharing your beliefs which is so helpful to so many of us…PRESENTLY….

    • helenvella

      Reply

      So glad to read your comments, memories are there to learn from and take the positive from and move forward with the positive learnings. Laughter is something a lot of people have forgotten to do, with everything going on in the world which is ever changing mostly for the negative most people don’t realize they have forgotten to be positive and laugh.

  8. Reply

    You have valuable information in your site. The different between success and failure is being awake. Very inspirational. Make your choice today and ‘wake up’ to a wonderful present and future…I just love this sentense! Thank you so much. Great site! I booked mark it so I can come back

    • helenvella

      Reply

      I appreciate your comments and feedback and I am glad you will be coming back here.

  9. Reply

    Yep, so true. I am a firm believer in letting the past go, and moving on. BUT also learning and growing from it. I have had a past relationship that was horrible, and it took a long time to just be happy with myself again, know that it was nothing I did wrong, learn and grow. So, I am right with you. People need to heed to this advice because it is spot on!

    • helenvella

      Reply

      Letting the past go can be a problem for many which is why there is so much depression and suicide. Sharing and caring helps people be more positive and learn and move on.

  10. Reply

    Thanks for this great post…. a real reminder that we all should enjoy life and not dwell on the past.
    During some cbt this kind of ways to think was touching to me but you quickly let life get in your way and forget to live in the moment, not the past. Thanks for the reminder!!

    • helenvella

      Reply

      Enjoying life and seeing the positive really helps with your health and wellness and also it is infectious so others can be more positive also. Thanks for your comments.

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